Politics
Overheard at an ISIS barbecue
TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 24, 2015 The Weekly Screed (#710) Overheard at an ISIS barbecue by David Benjamin SOMEWHERE IN SYRIA — A trio of Islamists — Ahmed, Mohammed and Kurlijo — gathered round a campfire, a Christian baby roasting on a spit. One says, “Ah, I love the smell of barbecued infidel in the morning.” “It’s…
Read MoreDiary of a wetback skip tracer
TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 25, 2014 The Weekly Screed (#700) Diary of a wetback skip tracer by David Benjamin “ICE deported almost 393,000 people from the U.S. in 2010. At $12,500 per person the cost to remove them was almost $5 billion.” — Associated Press This is the city. Los Angeles. I work here. I’m a dick.…
Read MoreWith friends like these…
MONDAY, NOVEMBER 17, 2014 The Weekly Screed (#699) With friends like these… by David Benjamin “… the Islamic State, or ISIS, is homegrown; its aim is not to strike far away, but to spread and impose its vision of Islamic society right here and right now…” — Thomas L. Friedman in Dubai MADISON, Wis. —…
Read MoreWhat’s in it for me?
THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 6, 2014 The Weekly Screed (#698) What’s in it for me? by David Benjamin “This is not the time to lay out an agenda.” — Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell MADISON, Wis. — Every election year, the New York Times sends reporters out to some depressed working-class community in flyover country — Ypsilanti,…
Read MoreThe first thing we do, let’s kill all the spies
THURSDAY, OCTOBER 30, 2014 The Weekly Screed (#697) The first thing we do, let’s kill all the spies by David Benjamin MADISON, Wis. — Americans tend to learn most of what we know about our “intelligence” establishment by watching TV. For example, I consumed a whole season of “Homeland” and discovered that your typical CIA…
Read MoreApocalypse now… and tomorrow… and the day after that
WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 22, 2014 The Weekly Screed (#696) Apocalypse now… and tomorrow… and the day after that by David Benjamin “Good morning, ladies and germs! It’s Monday, and I’m Fred Fiermonger, alongside my co-host Abigail Angst, and this is ‘Good Grief, America,’ your daily wake-up-and-smell-the-napalm call here on the Anecdotal News Network. As you all…
Read MoreA political scene we'd like to see
WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 15, 2014 The Weekly Screed (#695) A political scene we’d like to see by David Benjamin (A proposed script — without talking points — for Mary Burke, Wisconsin gubernatorial candidate, at Friday night’s second debate.) “Good evening, everyone. I’m Mary Burke. So what, right? “Most of you don’t know me from a hole…
Read More"Ick!"
WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 8, 2014 The Weekly Screed (#694) “Ick!” by David Benjamin “This is judicial activism at its worst. The Constitution entrusts state legislatures, elected by the People, to define marriage consistent with the values and mores of their citizens. Unelected judges should not be imposing their policy preferences to subvert the considered judgments of…
Read MoreIf you don’t buy this war, we’ll kill this dog
WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 17, 2014 The Weekly Screed (#691) If you don’t buy this war, we’ll kill this dog by David Benjamin “The Queen had only one way of settling all difficulties, great or small. ‘Off with his head!’ she said, without even looking round.” — Lewis Carroll, Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland MADISON, Wis. — With…
Read MoreThe next Bill of Rights: A few suggestions
THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 4, 2014 The Weekly Screed (#690) The next Bill of Rights: A few suggestions by David Benjamin PARIS — One of the charms of a few weeks among our French friends is hearing them bellyache about the government. Not ours. Theirs! They gripe about weak leadership, legislative gridlock, a chaotic and divisive party…
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